i think i'm getting an ulcer

sometimes i really don't understand the entire university system. i may have missed something here, but it seems to me that giving assignments so big i have to skip class in order to finish them seems like a step backwards.

i do have work this weekend. the ladies at reitman's are really nice. that doesnt mean i won't want to kill myself after my seven hour shift on saturday. oh, and i just found out that my tuition is six hundred dollars more than i thought. i just about had a meltdown in boyd's class the other day and actually had to leave. i couldn't stand being in there any longer.
it seems like everybody i know is freaking out. everybody is broke and stressed and bitchy. kelly's new roommate thomas is giving her grief. sweetest guy i have ever met, but sure can act dumb. the other week she went through some awful shit too, so she has been staying at my place lately. which is fine, but tonight i was by myself for a few hours and it. was. awesome. i love everybody at school, but the idea of three weeks without seeing them every day sounds pretty fuckin rad right about now.

bryce confused me beyond belief. a lovely brunch. watched a movie later that night. kissed in the rain. was pretty much bowled over by the cliche-ness of it all. talked tuesday night. went to his place wednesday night and ended up staying over...we didn't have sex. i'm not stupid. but i was so happy to spend the night with him. awkward morning. didn't talk for three days. a stupid conversation at reggae night on the phone. i asked him "bryce, do you want to hang out at all anymore?" he told me "that is the rudest thing." alrighty. called me last night to hang out.
I DO NOT SPEAK MAN LANGUAGE. manguage.

je sais comment

a girl donia who i am going for coffee with tomorrow just asked me what my interests are. i said edith piaf, mini-wheats, old buildings, pretty rainboots, and allen ginsberg.

well that was quite the weekend. saturday night was the jason collett show. i met him. i hugged him. the world imploded. and i died happily.
honestly though, it was an amazing concert. somehow richard's on richards got double booked (there was a fetish party going on after...i had to wade through the fetish-ees to get out) so the band only played for an hour. the opening band...rock plaza central? i loved them. jason was phenomenal. my opinion might not count since i was standing at the edge of the stage with my face turned upward in the utmost ecstatic fangirl expression, but they pulled together by the end and the last song - i'll bring the sun! of all songs - was phenom. phenom. the opening band suddenly appeared onstage with their trumpets and trombones, and i suddenly heard the sound of a cowbell behind me and turned around to see the drummer coming through the crowd, banging on a cowbell for all he was worth, and kelly and i were dancing and clapping and shrieking for all we were worth. it was an amazing moment.

but the show ended by 10, so we made our way to the cambie where we ran into mike and ben and a few other random german buddies. after this point and my fifth ginger-and-rye, i don't remember the night. i don't remember kissing mike, though there are pictures of it. ugh. i don't remember him confessing his undying love for kelly. i don't remember peeing on the sidewalk. i stayed in bed all of sunday. not doing that again for a while.
i shared a smoke with Neanderthal today. am beginning to think that is a lost cause.

all hallow's eve

i trekked into kelly's apartment tonight with a stack of dvds in one hand and a greasy bag of BK in the other. the dvds were planned. the bag of sin was not.
i screwed up big time at work today. i don't even want to get INTO it. anyway, after work i was so depressed that i slunk into burger king, and ate my whopper hunched over like the food-loving fool that i am.

halloween wasn't going to be very big. kelly and i just watched the shining, which is one of my favorite movies. we decided that nobody does contempt like jack nicholson does. he is the master of the ugly sneer, the how-could-you-be-so-damn-thick look. we also watched more eddie izzard, as usual.
my pals and gals in victoria are probably partying it up right now. its probably better that i did not go...because a) i can't afford it and b) my habit of getting posessive when it comes to The Engineer do not mix well with the random hook-ups that usually happen at parties. no doubt i would have forced something to happen, which in itself is probably the worst idea i could have right now.
Neanderthal and i were texting earlier, but that seems to have slowed down...coinciding, i'm guessing, with his drinking speeding up. tonight when kelly and i walked to schlockbuster and then to the 711 for soda to mix ourselves up some drinks, downtown across the water looked so pretty and so alive, i wished we were down there. but now i'm remembering i have a job interview at reitman's tomorrow (don't know how to feel about that), and a huge ass paper due soon, and a serious VISA bill probably in the mail at this very moment.

right now i can hear all these weird thumps and dragging noises outside. no joke. i am a huge horror movie fan, but i don't know how long kelly and i are going to be trying to fall asleep in separate rooms. happy halloweenie.

return of the bumpasaurus

it rain, rain, rained today. i suppose i should've expected it, and expect some more of it, but still. it was impossible to get out of bed this morning, especially after yesterday. last night went well though. farah who was FOH manager was this crazy middle eastern lady who called me "my angel" and "my sweetheart" and kept messing with me over the headset. "HEAD USHER!" "this is head usher." "nothing, i wanted to make sure you were listening." for the second half we hung out in the office playing solitaire, where i lost every game and farah kept yelling "you loser! you loser! i am going to laugh so hard, i think this will be my death, yes?"

my secret crush on Neanderthal seems to be waning. i say 'seems to be' because depending on what time of day you ask me it seems to differ. i don't know why. i do know now, however, that he is possibly the only other person in the world who knows what the phantom tollbooth is. he also remembered bedknobs and broomsticks far too well for someone who apparently only watched it when they were a kid. i find myself saying "fuck" to everything he says, "fuck thats awesome", "fuck that shit", "for fuck's sake". its not what i would call stimulating conversation. then again, my language has gone down the toilet since i started living on my own.

i have not used construction paper in ages. i just spent the past three hours making a cd for kelly, since her roommate/friend is moving back to alberta tomorrow and we will be watching scary movies at her place. i made a slipcover for it too...on the front is an owl, saying "hoo hoo...who's cd?"
i also just listened to sir mix-a-lot for three solid hours. you didn't think it could be done? well, now it can.